Santa

Here we are now finally reaching the end of the 2 month well 3 months if you discount the post promos activities. So these holidays have been no different from last years 'cept that I've been having this nagging worry about something. Ah yes, school work. Simply because last year this time I didn't have any school to go to! Well what wouldn't I give to be "school - less" again? Anyway, Christmas is coming up this week. For the Christians, Merry Christmas and for everyone else, Seasons Greetings. Now, what the hell is Seasons Greetings? Christmas isn't exactly in between any 2 seasons but then since we're in Singapore and we only have one bloody season guess it don't really matter. But why Seasons Greetings I don't know, that's a question for the Gah men.
So, since Christmas is coming, guess it's time to write our letters to whom else? Santa Claus of course! It's really important to write to Santa else he might just forget your presents.

Dear Santa,
This year has been like every other year and I know it and you know it. Why? Cos I've been bad as usual and this probably explains why I haven't received a single present from you for the past seventeen years. You're really mean ya know Santa. Sure I've been a little evil and stuff but so has everyone else right? But you never ever gave me anything. Not even a reindeer. Damn you. But I'll get to that later Santa. Now I've something more pressing to discuss with you.
Recently, I've seen many videos of you behaving badly too. And it must have been real BAD Santa cos the videos had NSFW ratings. That's not suitable for work for the uninitiated meaning ahem highly inappropriate content. On top of that there've been news reports of you making rude comments to shoppers. See here. What do you have to say for yourself Santa? You jolly old hypocrite.
Now Santa I gotta ask you why are you always dressed in red, growing a beard and riding on reindeers? You're known as Father Christmas but Jesus didn't wear red, didn't have a beard and the best he rode on was a donkey. Thus Santa I think you’re one big fake and that's why I never receive any presents from you. Of course feel free to prove me wrong. And don't justify the lack of presents with my behavior cos you've been bad too Santa. So lean over and let me spank you, you bastard.
Merry Christmas and enjoy your hols Santa!

Yours Sincerely,
Nofing

I'm sure Santa has advanced with the times so he probably has a MacBook powered by a quad core Intel chip and of course WiFi connection, 802.11n no less so he'll be able to read my letter too. Alright, that's enough for now Merry Christmas everyone and don't forget to do your holiday homework!

Musings

Today I'm going to talk about two issues close to our hearts and no, one of them isn't Britney Spears night out "commando" style with fellow "comrade" Paris. Though that's one topic worth a second look (don't mind the pun) but anyway that's a topic best left to one's interpretation and imagination. Still I must add my two cents worth. Sure Britney could go party the life out of her but going without undies and claiming she's enjoying her freedom? I wonder what she's trying to imply. You mean K Fed(ex) chained her panties or something? Again it's just speculation on my part so do take everything I say here with a pinch of salt.
Now onto issue number one - violent teachers in schools. Yea for those who've been reading the papers, there's been a recent flurry of letters to the forums about abusive teachers. Having read most of these letters, I'm compelled to believe that from the 1970s to now, the MOE must have been hiring part time psycho - killers to teach our students. Of course, that is wrong. They've been hiring full time professional psycho - killers! Lol. Seriously, are our teachers that bad? Yes I've met my fair share of bad teachers and the horror stories I shall gladly recount in a while but I say we give these teachers a break. Quit complaining to the forums cos if your teachers were as bad as you made them out to be, you wouldn't even have graduated from school much less write these silly letters. Whatever it is, it's in the past and if you had wanted redress it should have been settled then. Didn't dare to seek redress or couldn't? Too bad. Ahahaha. I've had bad teachers and I sure as hell sought my own redress so if I can do it, it can't be that hard.
Anyway, I must start on my teacher horror stories now before I forgot all the little exaggerations I added to them.
Horror story #1
I remember in my primary school, I had this Chinese teacher in P6. Sure I wasn't a model student (never wanted to, never was and never will be ) but I still did hand up some of my work and pass the spelling tests. But somehow he still didn't like me much. And about a month before the prelims the bugger told me and my class most gleefully that I wouldn't make it to secondary school. Imagine how I felt then. A little kid with my fragile self esteem and my dearest teacher whom I respected so much told me I couldn't make it to secondary school? Well, in the words of Dave Chappelle, "Kiss my ass bitch". So after that incident, I never did hand up any more work, turned all his lessons into a war game with my friends and I shooting paper pellets all over and making a helluva noise. And then after the PSLE when I got my results which were rather ok I went up to him and said "kiss my ass bitch". Ok I made that last bit up but it's still rather mean of a teacher to condemn a small kid like that. Oh and for those who don't know who Chappelle is, do go and check him out.
Horror story #2
This happened in P1 again with my Chinese teacher. (Now you know why I don't have a strong inclination towards Chinese) Back then the teachers were indeed more violent and there were many occasions when my fellow classmates and I had to kneel on the dirty floor, stick out our hands and get our knuckles rapped. Damn, I thought I was a student not a Prisoner of War. Alas the teacher thought otherwise. Also I had me books torn and thrown about so yea that much is true about teachers back then.
There's a hell lot more shit that happened in secondary school but since I've gotten bored with recounting these tales I shall leave them for another time.
Now I must talk about the other issue. That of manners of the lack of it in community libraries. Having read the report in the Sunday Times and the comments made by people caught in the act be it sticking their feet everywhere, digging their ears etc, I'm really astonished by the behavior of us Singaporeans. It was so ridiculous I thought it was a joke. Especially this comment by a guy whose name I've forgotten but it's in the papers anyway and he has this to say about his behavior, "If you don't like it build another place for yourself." What the hell man. Some people really think no one reads the papers or something. Anyway point is Singapore is still a free country and granted it's not unlawful to stick your feet up or shave yourself but do please have some restrain man. And no taking off your foot ware don't mean you're not dirtying the chair and thereby showing consideration for others. Might as well say I piss on your hand and that's cool 'cos I ain't pissing all over the floor.

Holidays

These days have been pretty boring days. There's pretty nothing much left to do. Movies, games, holidays everything. And now there's still more than 1 month of holidays left. And strangely in my school, there's homework for the holidays (maybe they thought we would get bored) and when there was mention of a physics test next year week 2, I thought for once the physics department was trying to be nice. Alas, I realized that week 1 of 2007 has only 2 or 3 days. Damn. Guess JC life is really different from secondary school. Where our tests were rather spaced out and there were so few and failing all of them didn't really matter. Well at least it didn't matter to me though it did get me a seat in the exclusive diamond club where I was the unofficial self-elected president. Pretty fun. Oh well, that must be all for now and probably for the rest of these hols until next year when I have to go back to that school then maybe I'll be inspired to write something nasty. Lol. I'm joking, seriously.

Musings

Ahh these few days have been some rocking days man. First Saddam "MaDDass" Hussien is gonna get hung for some offences no one really cared about but who asked him to piss Bush off with those threats of WMDs anyway? And speaking of Bush it looks like he'll be taking a break real soon. After all the war in Iraq is taking its toll on him right? But then again no one has heard from the Democrats for more than a decade so US politics is currently a gamble between the devil and the deep blue sea. And ahem, we could well draw some similarities with Singapore politics too. PAP's been ruling since forever? But they won't be relinquishing their position as government soon given our less than credible opposition and the fact that the PAP don't seem to make half as many blunders as the Bush administration.
Now onto more local stuff. As many of you should know, the Penal Code's been revisited recently and among some of the proposed changes is the decriminalization of oral and anal sex between consenting heterosexual couples. And the first thing that came to mind was you guessed it. Tammy. Looks like she and her little boy are gonna get off the hook this time round if this change is implemented. This brings us on to oral/anal sex between gay couples. Now I'm not saying I'm gay or approve of unnatural sex but why doesn't the government approve of gay sex? This is something I really don't understand and their basis of moral considerations is really weak. Still, it's comforting to know that gay sex isn't allowed cos I cannot imagine the day when gays start making out in parks or best the MRT. Lol. Then there was the bit on marital immunity. If the changes on this are implemented, then a husband can be charged for raping his wife. Wtf man. Mr. Husband raping Dear wife? This is technically wrong right? Apparently not so if they are going through a divorce or the wife has a PPO (Personal protection order) against him or I forgot the last exception. Lol. Anyway, if a (normal) couple is undergoing divorce proceedings then it stands to reason that they can't be together usually due to "irreconcilable differences" ala Britney and "K Fed". And if that's the case then surely sex if the last thing on their minds. Or maybe not if the wife is some hottie or the man is some sex maniac. But if that's the case then the man must be out of his mind to approve or worse suggest a divorce. Oh well the law works in strange ways don't it? And then there was the bit on sex with minors overseas. See I really don't understand what the government's recent fascination with sex is. Anyway, now if you organize sex outings with minors overseas or get on with it yourself, the Police are going to have a heyday catching you with your pants down. So please don't go have sex with minors. Please it's disgusting.
That must be about all the changes they want to implement. Actually not, truth is the other changes were of little interest to me. Lol. Oh yes, there was an article today or yesterday about some guy who bought fake Viagra and was caught at the customs for consumption of Ice. Apparently, this guy's been on Viagra for some time and recently lost his job but not his sex drive. Hence he still needed Viagra but couldn't afford the real deal so he drove over the causeway to get some Indian Viagra. Why Indian I don't know. Maybe the reporter liked eating briyani or something. Anyway this Indian Viagra was much cheaper and it contained Ketamine, Ice and some other drugs. Apparently every other drug but those used in the real Viagra since the man claimed that the fake Viagra didn't "have any effect". (Except giving him a high which very well explains why he couldn't get it up.) So on that fated day, when he was supposed to get it going with his wife, he popped a fake Viagra only to have the appointment canceled at the last moment. After which he had to go to JB for some business deals. And it was at the customs that the immigration officers arrested him and he tested positive for Ice. And he was charged in court where he wound up telling his sad tale in front of a whole court room. I really pity this guy. To be caught for drugs consumed unknowingly is bad enough. To be cheated out of his money to buy Viagra. Worse. To have to recount to a whole court room this story and have it published in the papers and have everyone me included know that you are sexually dysfunctional. Priceless. Whoever said life was fair man?
And there was dear Dr M. I call him Dr M because the media calls him that and also because the spell check keeps pointing out Mahatair. Looks like M (Microsoft) Word doesn't like his name too much either. So, this fella has more or less burnt all his bridges including the curvy one supposed to replace the causeway. Let's see who is going to come to his rescue this time round. Definitely not LKY I bet. Hmm maybe he and Dr Chee could be pals or something. Both are "Doctors" and both are wired the wrong way. Sweet.
And that leaves me with my last thought for the day. The Wee Shu Min aka elitist I don't give a &^(# 'bout you poor sods scandal. I guess the stupidest thing 'bout this whole case is the damned fact that her father is an MP. Yes you read that right. Dear Daddy is a Member of Parliament. And you must be thinking just what the hell does daddy teach dearest wee shu min at home? Or maybe not given that she's an elitist in a real decent junior college on a humanities scholarship so she's probably real busy with no time to listen to daddy preach. Yea, busy reading emails her mommy's friends send her and dissing the shit out of the people in them. As expected daddy came to her defense and even some MPs agree that kids nowadays are "insensitive and provocative" with their remarks so we should pardon them. Really? Insensitive and provocative to the point of insulting someone else's pride and dignity? I guess that's really crossing the line man. It's one thing to poke fun maybe even be sarcastic but to run down a fella whom you don't even know is plain wrong. See, even I know that. And the solution to this problem? In the words of the MP who said teens might be insensitive and provocative, (Irony? Heh.) "Only through the spirit of humility and service can the barriers of arrogance, pride and snobbery be overcome." Hear, hear.

Hols

It's been ages since I've touched this space but I feel rather bad riding on Blogger's bandwidth yet contributing nothing to it. So here I am with nothing to write about. Well I couldn't very well talk about school so it brings us back to the timeless subject of PW.
So PW is in its final stages. The birth pains they call it. But actually I find it rather painless. Yep. Cos the only thing that's left of this bloody subject is the OP (Oral Presentation) which determines if you're orally proficient one way or another. (Now, now don't think otherwise.) And in my humble opinion (IMHO), there's no way to prepare for OP. I mean what do you plan to do? Practice your lines in front of the mirror for half hour sessions 5 times a day? Hell no. Or keep clicking those slides till you know exactly the time taken and the type of animation used for each line? Like &$*# I will. Best thing you can do is hide those damned scripts and go watch some movies. Well that's what I keep telling myself so let's just keep it that way.
There's really nothing much more worth mentioning here except for the fact that everyone seems to be DoTAing lately. Really cool but please don't IM me to DoTA after 11. Worse still, call my home to ask me. That's about all for now. Time to proceed with my other nocturnal activities. Sleeping.

Physics

 

GP

 

Maths

 

The Results Show

Well well, it's official almost sad that I'll most likely make the jump over to JC2. And that leaves me one step closer to the As and of course NS. Which kinda sucks since I thought we could just remain in J1 forever. But I'm not here to go on 'bout how nice it would be if we could all stay put and rot or something. No, I'm here today to highlight the highlights of my promos. Yea exams come and go but it's the shit that you (and the markers) write in it which brings back the memories.
For one there was my Maths. The one about m<0. For the record, I still don't know why m<0 and apparently neither does the marker. And just for your viewing pleasure I've decided to upload the answer script here so we could all have another laugh at it.
Then there was GP with some rather cryptic comments 'bout my AQ being very "radical" and I should "go check with my GP tutor's answer scheme." And I've got a copy of it too though the markers handwriting leaves much to be desired? LOL, but compared to mine, guess it isn't so bad after all.
And how can we forget about Dearest Physics. For the record I passed my Physics promos by zero but I doubt I'll pass it overall. But I'll still promote so no worries there. Physics was kind of a joke and there's a hell lot of stuff written in there by the markers and since there's so much I shan't bother putting it here cos it'll take me too much time and effort. (I got better things to do ya know. Like studying for my As....)
So, after all that's been said and done what's in for me now? I guess for many of us, we've yet to recover from the shock our results gave us. Be it an overdose of vitamin A or U. Still it's not the end of the road. There's still a long way to go from here. And if I don't see you next year don't fret. Just pick yourself up and move on. If I'm feeling nice I might just drop by to look for you.

PW

Just moments ago, my PW leader sent me the WR file which somehow or other was nearly 2mb. But that's not the point. I was wondering why he had sent me the file at all. So he replied that "I should go edit my part" as if it were the most natural thing for me to do. Honestly, I don't give a damn 'bout PW now. Yea maybe I'll regret next year like I did with my Chinese when I topped the level, bottoms up as my then Chinese teacher most kindly told me. But still right now I'm in no mood for explaining why I chose this darn project and give a hundred and one reasons how to improve on it.
Anyway, there's really nothing much more that's happening now in this post promos slump so that's all I guess. Lol.

And I'm proud to add I won't be doing anything to the WR much less edit my part so I'm going to get it real bad next week. But what to do, that's life - the bit on not doing my WR.

Post Promos

It seems that all things good and bad must come to an end. And so it seems that after all that mugging, the promos are finally over. Sadly for the Physics people like me, we still have the bloody SPA to contend with next week. But that is of little concern to me given that I never really excelled at Physics. Now that the promos are over, I realized that I've nothing to do. I mean there's only that much DoTA you can play before you get bored of it.
So I shall do what the other kiasu Singaporean kids will do - start worrying about promotion. I find it kind of sad that we must waste time thinking 'bout getting retained. Indeed, while no one in their right mind would want to get retained, getting retained isn't the end of the world. And I'm pretty I'm going to draw a lot of flak for that statement since talk is cheap. But honestly, given a chance there're a hell lot of things I wished I had and hadn't done this year. So getting retained would give me a chance to right some wrongs. But that wouldn't be for me to decide, since one can't volunteer to retain. But one can of course volunteer to screw up one's promos which would most definitely get one retained. So to all the students out there worrying 'bout promotion, don't worry too much. Cos if you're going to get retained, you will get retained haha; but the point is taking it in the right spirit and moving on and not repeating it again next year cos for the guys especially that would be no "next year".
And with that in mind, I shall go back to my DoTA and figure out my life after the results are in.

Promos Day Four

I am frantically counting down to this Friday so that I can play in peace. Well not really since I still have Physics SPA next week but then SPA isn't exactly the most important thing on my agenda right now.
Moving on, there was Chemistry SPA today which I find is getting plain ridiculous. What is the point of doing the same experiment for 10 weeks then do the exact same thing during SPA? It's almost as if the teachers don't teach and just give us the promo papers to do all year round. Then come October give us the same paper but we do it in the hall. Really, SPA makes little sense to me. Anyway, SPA was exactly the same as the previous experiments we did no surprises there. But what was strange was that half way through the paper, everyone had finished. And that was when the fun started. See, since we had to do some experiment first we had a fair bit of chemicals and equipment lying around. And there was this long glass thing either the burette or the pipette which I found very useful for prodding the guy in front of me. Then there was the water bottle thingy. I realized that the more you tilt it upwards, the further it squirts! Imagine how much fun we had. Not to mention the many more titrations we did. I somehow managed to finish all my reagents that I winded up titrating water with well more water? Still, it was a bloody exam so the rules were in place which was quite a pity cos we might have ended up in a war. With the long glass thing as light sabers and the water bottles as guns.

Promos Day Three

Today marks the end of my second last theory paper for promos. Indeed after all that has come to past, it has finally come to an end. What a relief, what joy, oh the freedom and the pleasure until the results return that is. Anyway, I've already started slacking around not giving too much thought 'bout my remaining papers.
Back to business now; Physics was on the menu today and what can I say? Or what's there to say? Well for one paper 1 was stupid. See I don't know what's with my current fascination over toilet breaks but the Physics paper 1 was only 40 minutes? That's even worse than the Econs paper because a 40 minutes paper breaks the toilet break examination rule. See for the first 30 minutes we can't leave and neither can we do so in the last 15 minutes. And if you observe carefully, there's a 5 minute overlap. Well it's really nothing much but just a thought.
So, after paper 1 when everyone was just sitting around not doing much, the Chief Presiding Examiner (CPE) just had to say that all students who wished to go to the toilet would kindly step up to the front of the hall to queue. And lo and behold, suddenly every guy in the hall had to go to the toilet! It's as if they've never been to a toilet before. Well they probably haven't been to a toilet filled with so many guys dying to pee. And it was pretty stupid watching the group of clowns waiting for their turn to go to the toilet. Hence I propose that in future, we allow the guys and girls (if they want to) to pee into their water bottles! This makes sense because there wouldn't be any water left in the bottle since they drank it all up hence the need to pee. And if they stayed in the hall to pee we wouldn't have to waste time queuing. And imagine how interesting conversations would get.
"Hey mate that's a big 'un there."
"Crickey, it's waving at me!"
Damn. But that probably wouldn't happen since things would get rather tense between members of the sexes. And let's not bring back the birds and the bees and the honey and what have you back into this shall we?

Promos Day Two

For the first time in my life, I had a chance to sit for a 3 hour Math paper and I must say it's been quite an experience. For one, this being a 3 hour paper, it meant we could all take turns to go to the toilet, multiple times. Doesn't that sound great? Anyway, apart from the toilet breaks there is really nothing very exciting about being seated for 3 hours doing Math. Rather I'm more used to sitting in front of the computer and doing Math for 3 minutes which sort of explained my restlessness during today's paper. All the same I somehow or other managed to finish my paper even if it meant giving wacky answers. For example there was this question asking why m<0. I read it and I asked myself too, why must m<0? Alas it was a trick question or so I thought thus I gave a reply, cos that's the way it is. I mean why else would m<0? Why must we all be so negative? Let's spread some positive cheer around here shall we?
That's beside the point since that m<0 bit was worth only a mark; but the part behind it which seemingly required prior knowledge as to why m<0. Ah, that one I couldn't do either and it was worth 3 marks. Damn. Needless to say, I'm not too sure about Math now that I'm reflecting about it. But it's too late for regrets. Only thing I can do now is to look forward to Physics and see what other nonsensical answers I can flood the examiners with.

Promos Day One

Today there was GP and Econs which meant 4 and half hours of non stop writing. Nothing very interesting 'bout the 2 papers though if I fail both I'll get retained.
Anyway, I must talk about this weird exam rule. It's the one on not going to the toilet during the first 30 minutes and the last 15 minutes. And my Econs paper was split into 2 parts. DRQ and essay and each one was 45 minutes. So half way through the paper, when I realized I had forgotten everything about demand and the shit, the teacher said there was 15 minutes left and we couldn't leave the hall. So I realized that there was no way to leave the hall since we can't leave in the first 30 minutes and the last 15 minutes. And 30 + 15 = 45 for all you Maths failures out there. Therefore, it is theoretically impossible to go the toilet during the Econs paper. This is a very serious error and misjudgment on the Intrnal Examinations Committee (IEC). What happens if a student really needs to go the toilet? Is he gonna have to pee in his pants or skirt (not possible since skirt got no eh? cloth underneath?) or whatever and become a negative externality? All the same, no one went to the toilet during the Econs paper, obviously and well maybe I'll make it a point to try and go to the toilet during a 45 minute paper in future. Also I guess we must go feedback to the IEC not to have 45 minute papers else we can't have our toilet breaks.

Promos

I've no idea what I'm doing here right now given that my promos officially begin tomorrow and I'm in no way prepared for my GP or Econs. Then again how do you study for GP or Econs for that matter? But much as these 2 subjects seem insignificant, I can't afford to fail either because if I do, I'll get RETAINED and that kind of sucks.
I guess getting retained isn't so much the hassle of going through yet another year of shit but it's more of the stigma attached to it. Like what one of my friends said. It's during the festive seasons like CNY when those alien relatives descend on your doorstep and start asking the most irrelevant of questions. Like, "boy ah you this year still studying ah?" C'mon, the fact that I'm standing in front of you means I'm not yet in NS and neither am I in jail so it stands to reason that I must be in school since I can't think of any other reason as to why my parents would keep me in the house if I'm no longer schooling. Anyway, I can't really be bothered by that right now. Right now, I'm still trying to figure out which subjects I might pass so that I can get promoted.
You know in secondary school when we had 8 subjects it made things a hell lot easier. Reason being it's more difficult to get retained though some individuals have proven otherwise. But for the majority passing 3 out of 8 subjects isn't exactly the hardest thing to do. Besides, even subjects like English and Chinese count which makes it really easy. Compared to now, we've 5 subjects and we need to pass 3. Damn.
But I'm not too concerned 'bout which subjects to pass since they all seem equally bad. So I'll take my chances and not study too much for any one subject. That way I get to cover more ground and in economics terms it's something called allocative efficiency right? Wrong I guess but what the hell.
Now, this entry is getting harder and harder to write since I've sworn never again to mention my school (see I don't even dare say which school) on this space or anywhere else. And that leaves me with very much nothing at all to write about. And since that's the case then I might as well end off here and really go and try figure out what allocative efficiency really is.

Change

I've decided to wipe everything clean once again after a series of events. Anyway, it's not the end but a new beginning. There'll be more stuff here. Just don't expect anything school related. Yea, once bitten, twice shy.
Oh and the quote of the day: I choose not to be a "tool of torture, but a source of inspiration." Guess where that came from?
Think about it.